08 February 2011


My day has been long.  Running people to carpools, school, home, park and home again.  Girl Scouts, dinner, pick up from Girl Scouts.  Things seem to be fine though.  Not too tired, youngest child getting in some Daddy time,  oldest and I having a good time. 

Stop at the store for a cup of coffee to get me through studying tonight.  Indulge the request for a small bag of cookies for snack tomorrow after school.  Smiles, laughing, everything still ok.

Home for good tonight.  Walking into the house, child suddenly sullen.  Asks when I can attach the rest of her patches onto her vest.  Patches?  What patches?  Apparently she has given be two bags of patches that need to be ironed on.  I gently tell her that I don't really know where they are, but we can look for them.  However, it is currently 9pm and there is nothing I can do about this right now. 

Commence all hell breaking loose.  She gave them to me!  I lost them!  Why can't I look now!?

I stay calm, I let her know that I can look for them, but this is not the time to get all upset about it.  That we can look this week and if I still can't find them, I can order more.  Not a huge issue.

Apparently I am wrong.  This is a major issue.  My words are not being heard.

Screaming, yelling, crying...wash, rinse, repeat.

Dad is now involved.  The tantrum increases.  I am getting pissed.  Why is this happening now?  Why do we have to end another day in tears? 

I am an emotional person.  It took me years to manage my emotions and handle them in a reasonable way.  It is hard to see the same struggle in your own child.  I try to use the tools that I have and know to help her, but sometimes it just does not seem to work.  I feel for her, I really do, but the adult frustration is there as well.  I am thankful that her Dad is here to help balance it and to talk to her when I no longer can.  It is hard to not let what is said not hurt.  I wish I had a magic wand and could fix the issue right now, but I don't.  I can only offer what I can do this week.  I can look, and if I find I will attach the patches.  If not, I can be in contact with her leader very easily and find out which ones I need to get. 

From my viewpoint, this is not the end of the world, but I understand why from hers it can feel like it.

I still wish I had a wand.


robyn said...

Patches are the root of all evil. They get lost before they get to you, they suck to iron on (make sure they stick, while trying to not burn the rest of the surrounding stuff), and then... they still come off. My daughter was in troop 6 for a few months last year, as we were in flagstaff and I couldn't ever get time to make it over to the GS store here.

DRAMA. It will get better. *hugz*

Anonymous said...

I can remember my mom sewing them on with clear thread (and eventually finding some that matched the background of the patch - not the thick edge. she'd sew just inside of that). But that was before they were really iron on. If you want to try sewing them on (once you find them), lemme know. I probably have thread in the correct color.

And I hear you on the swingy moods. We've had a day like that today.

Mom said...

Sorry that the fun evening ended up....not so fun. It gets better, and she will remember the good part of the day, not the melt down at the end as much as you will. She was tired is all and suddenly not having the patches was YOUR fault.....yes, I remember it well! - So be grateful that you have Guy to help with the hard stuff....and smile at these upsets, they are part of the moment. XOXOXOXO to all of you.

Anonymous said...

happy valentines, Terri, and thank you for writing this beautiful, personal blog. i look forward to seeing you. i have gifts for you and the girls, they are waiting patiently for you. - tenacity